You are not me.

“I would never do that to them” I would say as my Father just starred at me. I always hated his response. I knew what was coming next and I swear I didn’t want to hear it. “They aren’t you Brittinie.” WHAT THE HELL DID THIS EVEN MEAN?! At that age I couldn’t even think to comprehend how this made anything okay. All I felt was that this was an excuse. I took this as my Father taking the side of someone else who was not me. I remember this hurting my feelings. I couldn’t understand how my own flesh and blood could not understand where I was coming from. Read more…

Suicide.

I looked around the room as I cried, I couldn’t stop the pain that I was feeling. I wanted it to go away and I was trying so hard to fight it. I was so upset and angry that I wasn’t even focused on what made me that way in the first place anymore. All that I was worried about was what I was going to do next. At that moment all of my hope was gone, I didn’t see reason for me to be here anymore. I searched through my house and all of my cabinets. I found bottles and bottles of pills with different names on them. “What the fuck are these going to do for me?” I was thinking. I had this pain inside that was eating at me. It was like something had come over me that I’ve never felt before. This angry voice inside of me was just telling me “FUCK THIS, BRITTINIE.” Read more…

White-ish Podcast featuring Brittèrs.

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/white-ish/id1182842202?mt=2&i=1000389456338

I had the pleasure this weekend to feature on the White-ish Podcast with Jimmy and LoPicc. I definitely went into it feeling nervous but a few minutes into it both hosts had me feeling comfortable and ready to speak. We talked about some real topics on there and it was a great experience. A podcast has been something that many people know I  have been wanting to start on my own soon as well. This experience really made me realize how much I love to speak on my opinions and just get on the mic to speak for people to listen and also be entertained. Listen, Subscribe and review.

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The train ride that changed my day.

I just experienced something really touching on the train. This guy walked onto the train at the West 4th street stop, which is just a few stops before my job. I’m sitting there with my headphones in listening to music. Already starting my day off angry. The train was making me late to work, I’m stressed about my personal shit and the last thing I wanted to hear was anyone speaking. Read more…

The day I started my blog.

I’ll never forget the feeling I had inside when I was leaving work one day. I remember it was that “I want to cry, but I don’t know why” type of sentiment. I called one of my best friends because I was walking in the middle of Mid-town New York about to have a break down.

I was looking at the screen of my IPhone just thinking this girl better pick up her face-time. When Randee finally picked up of course that’s when the tears started rolling. I just needed someone to vent to. I knew the last place I wanted to go was home. I spoke with her as I was trying to figure out where I can go sit and have time to myself.

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The Do’s & Don’ts .. For men

Being that I am a woman I find that a lot of times we feel like men should know what we’re thinking. Certain things like what we would like them to do and what we would NOT like them to do. Now a lot of the times we either would rather not nag and complain because we want you to figure it out on your own. Another reason is because we feel like if we do spell it out that it won’t be done and that will bother us even more.

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